TOP 10 | Tracks to make you even more upset

IT SEEMS OUR roving reporter and resident compiler of lists Matt Sanchez is experiencing a tough break. Not content with extended misty-eyed Kid A listening sessions whilst hiding under the bed, here’s a list of tracks that will do absolutely nothing to help exorcise those inner demons…

10. Aphex Twin – Ventolin (1995)

An Aphex classic, a track so caustic, asthmatic and unpleasant to listen to that he had no choice but to release it as a single to promote his up and coming album ‘I Care Because You Do’!

I’m not quite sure why the US military chose Prodigy tracks to torture and obtain information; put the happiest person you know in a cell with this pumping out for 15 minutes and they’d be a quivering wreck beginning for their life by the end. Good for angry depressives.

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9. Roxette – It Must Have Been Love (1990, originally 1987 with Christmas lyrics)

I love Roxette. They’re one of my guilty pleasures and I used to have a massive crush on Marie when I was younger.

Though the lyrics refer to a lonely winter’s day after the break-up of a relationship, “It Must Have Been Love” became a summer sensation in 1990. This song is all about the realisation of exactly what you’ve lost once it’s all over. That coupled with a perfectly crafted, 80’s tinged pop song makes for some moments of sobbing… Awwww

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8. Blur – This is a Low

Lyrics about England and weather – always pretty depressing..  What sets me off in this track is Graham Coxon’s swirling and epic guitar solo that hits you in the chest with a wave of emotion.

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7. Gary Jules – Mad World (2003, original by Tears for Fears 1982)

Who couldn’t connect with a song about looking out at an insane world from the eyes of a young adult? And if that wasn’t enough to get suicidal thoughts running through your mind, composers Michael Andrews and Gary Jules somehow went ahead and made it even more dark and dreary than the Tears For Fears original.

I’m assuming the first time anyone heard this song at the end of Donnie Darko they ran to their local record store in a hurry for another fix. Listening to the sounds of a dreamy piano mixed with Jules’ adolescent-like vocal chops is a perfect way to help a dark moment last just a little bit longer.

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6. Radiohead – How To Disappear Completely (2000)

There are seriously so many depressing Radiohead tracks to choose, which I guess is why Radiohead is the favoured band of many suicide candidate (taking over from Waterloo Sunset by the Kinks, which has always been a popular suicide track).

This dirge could put a serious damper on any situation.

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5. Muse – Microcuts (2001)

In the same vain as the Aphex Twin track, this is for those angry moments. A constant build up with some insanely unhinged and worrying falsetto from Matt Bellamy – this song really makes me quite violent and unpleasant before I pop and break down in the middle of all the havoc I’ve created.

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4. Johnny Cash – Hurt (2002, original by Nine Inch Nails 1994)

I can absolutely guarantee there isn’t a person with a soul who is able to hold back the tears on this one. Even if you don’t really know Johnny’s music that well, you’ll still somehow find yourself emotionally attached to every note and word.

Even worse is to watch the video with the images of a visibly ailing Cash looking back on his legendary career. This makes for some serious drama that’s impossible to deny. Let the waterworks fly!

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3. Trivium – Throes of Perdition (2008)

More anger here from the Trivium lads! A track about the spasm and pains of losing your soul, which is a lot like the feelings you get when your heart is ripped to shreds. This tied with metalcore screaming and riffery plus a bottle of gin – you’re in for a depressing evening!

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2. Puff Daddy – I’ll be Missing you by  (1997)

As far as it’s a tribute to someone you miss, this track surprisingly touched me in a way that I never thought it could. Taking melodies from the Police track ‘Every Breath You Take’ and the American Spiritual ‘Ill Fly Away’ as well as Barber’s Adagio for Strings’ (in the full version) with Diddy’s heartfelt raps, the track brings up memories of those passed on and love lost. Surprisingly touching.

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1. P!nk – Just Like a Pill (2001)

This track alone is enough to make you want to top yourself, but the one outstandingly teeth grinding feature of this track happens in the chorus. I know about it because back in the day this track would bombard you in EVERY FUCKING SHOP IN STEVENAGE TOWN CENTRE.

Okay, listening to the chorus, there’s an incessant high pitched bell that follows the beat – listen out for it and you’ll begin to feel the urge to kill cute animals.

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You can write to Sanchez at the following address – 101 Gutter Street, Whiskey Avenue, SO3 5AD

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